


Bled Out

by RainbowFez



Category: My Babysitter's A Vampire
Genre: Ethan's Journal, M/M, Soulmates, Suicide
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-28
Updated: 2014-11-01
Packaged: 2018-02-23 01:02:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,301
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2528219
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowFez/pseuds/RainbowFez
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ethan sat on his bed, tears rolling from his eyes. “Goodbye” he whispered, looking around the room. Standing he ran his hand over his things, before grabbing Benny’s shirt. Ethan had taken it one time he slept over. “Benny” The boy’s lip quivered. “Benny I love you” He said allowed for the first time. Sitting back on his bed Ethan grabbed razor and began cutting his wrists.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

…Ethan’s room…  
Ethan sat on his bed, tears rolling from his eyes. “Goodbye” he whispered, looking around the room. Standing he ran his hand over his things, before grabbing Benny’s shirt. Ethan had taken it one time he slept over. “Benny” The boy’s lip quivered. “Benny I love you” He said allowed for the first time. Sitting back on his bed Ethan grabbed razor and began cutting his wrists. Over and over the blade cut his skin. It was painful, so painful but Ethan wanted it. Blood pooled out of his cuts as Ethan lay back on the bed, closing his eyes. His thoughts became fuzzy and the pain was gone. Benny’s face smiled at him. Ethan felt his life flash behind his eyelids. But it wasn’t his life it was Benny, because Benny was his life. Benny was everything, the sun and the moon, the earth and the sky. But Ethan had to go, he knew that. Benny needed to find love and Ethan would stand in his way. He was doing this for Benny so it was ok. Benny’s smile was the last thing he saw.  
…Benny’s house…  
Benny and his grandma were eating dinner, laughing about something they had seen on TV. The phone rang and grandma stood. The teen kept chuckling to himself as his grandma picked up the phone. Turning his head Benny saw the look on the old woman’s face. The only time he had ever seen that face before was after his parents died. She just stared at Benny, tears falling from her eyes. Hanging up the phone grandma stood in front of her grandson. “What happened” Benny asked, scared of the answer. She just led him to the living room, sitting them down on the couch. “Benny…” the old woman tried to talk but stopped short. “Grandma what happened” Benny pleaded. “Ethan committed suicide” She whispered. Benny’s face turned dark, his eyes going blank. “No no. Ethan wouldn’t do that” he squeaked out. Grandma hugged him as he began to cry. The tears didn’t stop, for the rest of the night Benny cried, everything in his world gone. When morning came Grandma put a sleeping spell on him. “I’m so sorry” She told him stroking his hair.  
…three days later…  
Benny stood with Ethan’s family, dressed in black. He walked into the funeral home to see the plain black coffin at the far end of the room. Walking toward it the world seemed to slow. It felt like hours walking toward it. Reaching the box the boy finally looked down. Ethan lay as if he was sleeping. He wore a long sleeve shirt. The world ended, right then and there. Benny fell to the ground in tears. Grandma, with the help of Mr. Morgan picked up the boy and led him outside. He sat against the wall curled in a ball weeping. Grandma tried to comfort him, but he pushed her away. “When you’re ready to come in, we’ll be waiting.” After much of the school entered the building, the crying boy was finally able to stand and walk back inside. A group of kids were standing next to his coffin as others stood in the corners chatting. It felt so unreal for Benny. Ethan was the world to him, his best friend, his brother. How had he not seen how horrible his best friend was feeling? He should have saw signs of the pain Ethan was going through. But it was too late now. Ethan was gone, everything was over. After many people had left, they proceeded to the funeral. Everything after they left was just a blur. People talked and said how amazing Ethan had been. It made Benny sick that these people were talking about him like this, the same people who ignored them and wanted nothing to do with Ethan. They just felt bad about not feeling bad. Ethan didn’t matter to them, they don’t deserve to be here. He watched as the coffin was placed in the ground. After that there was just darkness. He awoke in his bed. “You passed out” Grandma told him. She put a sleeping spell once again on him. Benny needed to rest, his life had changed forever. The boy he loved was gone, even if he hadn’t realized it yet.  
…Somewhere…  
Ethan felt tired, but at the same time wide awake. He lay on a white cloud in darkness. “Is this Heaven or Hell” He asked aloud. A blue light surrounded them and a small girl walked toward him. This is neither, your fate is still being decided. “Why am I on a cloud” He asked? “We find that the stereotyping helps people cope with the change. You don’t have to be on a cloud. I can make it anything you want.” She said, floating a few feet away from the cloud. “So do you think I’m going to hell” asked Ethan? “That is not my decision, but if I had to guess no. Well if you actually go to either.” A questing look crossed the dead boy’s face. The reason your fate has not yet been decided is because you are in limbo.” “What’s limbo” Ethan asked, laying down on the cloud. “Very few people enter limbo. Limbo is for the people who are stuck to the living world. Some from mistakes they made. There are quite a few reasons actually. Though you Ethan Morgan are stuck by one of the rarest reasons. You are connected to someone. The emotions you both share for each other are stronger than anything” “What does that mean” Ethan sked, confused again. “You have a soul mate. They are not necessarily your true love, as is common belief among you living. It means that you have another half. There is someone who you truly can’t live without, or die without. Because this person is still alive you must stay connected. Once you cross over there is no connection with the human world, so you’re stuck in limbo. You won’t have to wait too long. It may only take seventy years or so. It will just be a blink of an eye here.” “So I have to wait for Benny to die.” “I don’t know who your soul mate is” she said turning away. “But if it’s him then yes, unless of course he brings you back. But only a handful of people have been able to do that. Actually three. If you need me just call for Sam. In a flash she was gone leaving Ethan to rest his head on a puffy pillow.


	2. Chapter 2

…Benny’s room…

 

Benny lay curled in a ball crying. He had been like that for days and his grandmother was worried. It took all his effort just to leave the room, to eat or shower. He couldn’t make it out the door at all. It was as if he had just lost the will to live. Two weeks after the funeral things changed, Benny walked out of his room dressed in all black. I need to see the Morgans he told Evelyn. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea” she said, worried about his remarkable transformation. “I need something of Ethan’s.” Walking out of the house he hurried to his best friend’s house. It took two minutes for Mr. Morgan to answer the door. “Come in” he said getting out of the way. The house looked bad. Nothing had been cleaned or put away. “Hi Benny” Mrs. Morgan tried to smile. Benny felt horrible to mention Ethan. “Can I have something of Ethan’s” Benny whimpered out, tears threatening to pour out again. “Of course” Mrs. Morgan said, looking at the floor. “But Benny no one has been up to Ethan’s room since…” “Ok” Benny whispered out making his way slowly up the stairs. His insides were cold as he moved towards the room. Everything inside him screamed, but had had to do it. He couldn’t hide anymore. Opening the door he entered. Everything looked normal, as if Ethan could walk in at any time and ask to play Zombiefighters3 with him. Benny smiled remembering his best friend’s smile as they wrestled. He turned getting lost in his thought. As his eyes met the Bed he was ripped back to reality. There was no sheet or blanket or anything on the mattress. This was where His best friend died. Sitting down Benny began to cry. He didn’t know what compelled him but he lay on the bed imagining Ethan was next to him, that he was asleep, snoring lightly like he always did. After a few minutes the teen composed himself enough to stand. All he wanted was something of Ethan’s, something he could have forever. Running his hand over Ethan’s things he looking at each one individually. His foot touched something on the floor. “My shirt” He whispered, but kept moving. Benny wouldn’t be able to wear it again. Reaching the desk he opened it. A small black book, something like a journal was tucked away in the back. Benny opened to the first page to find it empty. Holding the book close to his chest Benny walked down the stairs and out the door, not making eye contact with anyone. Everything out side was beautiful. The sun was shining, not a cloud in the sky. Birds chirped and a small breeze blew in the spring air. But it all seemed stale to Benny. That was what life felt like, Stale. Everything felt gray and tainted. Life just seamed pointless. Benny knew Ethan would want him to move on. And that’s what he was going to do. He wouldn’t forget Ethan, Ethan would always be his best friend. No one would ever replace him. But Ethan would want Benny to keep on living. 

 

…Benny’s room…

 

Benny plopped onto his bed. The book was still over his heart. “I will never forget you” he whispered to the book. Opening the book he grabbed a pencil. In big letters he wrote. The story of Ethan Morgan and Benny Weir, Best friends forever. It was going to hurt a lot but Benny was going to write down all they had been through together. He never wanted to forget, not a single moment. Turning the page again he found Ethan’s writing. “Ethan’s Journal” Benny stared at the page. “Should I read it” he asked himself aloud. All logic said no. This was Ethan’s and these were his privet thoughts. But it could explain why Ethan …died. But did he really want to know. Did he really want to understand whatever drove his best friend down so far into a depression? Conflicted and scared he turned the page  
…………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

9/23/2013

Today is a very important day. Other than the fact that the town was almost turned into coffee zombies yesterday. No today is important because I’m going to admit my biggest secret, the one that I’ve been hiding for three years, the one that’s eating me alive. I’m in love with my best friend Benny Weir. Yea I know, crazy right. I never told him, and I don’t think I ever will. I fell for benny three years ago. It wasn’t like he did some miracles thing or some earth changing event made me realize. No it was just an average day, we were walking together to school like always and the sun came out of the clouds. It shone down and Benny, lighting up his face and making his hair shine. He just looked down at me and laughed. In that moment everything felt right. Everything was perfect. Of course it didn’t stay that way. We had to go into school and the world started again. My feelings have only gotten stronger. I want to tell him but also don’t. I’m afraid of what would happen. Benny’s straight. He flirts with every girl he sees. I’d never say out loud but it hurts me to see him do that. I feel insignificant. I know it’s not his fault or mine. It’s just the way the world works. Benny is going to go out and find some beautiful girl, someone who’ll finally realize how amazing he is. And I will just watch, sad and angry. I don’t want to be angry though. I can’t take my anger out on anyone because of my feelings. It’s wrong. I feel sad a lot. but what gets me through is Benny’s smile. I love his smile. It’s the most beautiful thing in the world. Every time he smiles my heart leaps and it feels like the sun is shining down on me. I have to go, my mom is calling me. But I think this helped. I was considering burning this when I was done but I think I’m gonna keep it. I’m actually writing a journal. A guy with a journal, that’s so gay. Haha bad joke.  
………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………

Benny just sat there in shock. Ethan loved him. He was right when he thought it was a bad idea to open the book. He was so confused. Ethan had loved him. He hadn’t loved Ethan. “Oh God is that why he killed himself” Benny cried out. “I made him kill himself.” He threw the journal on the floor and crawled under the covers. “I’m the worst person in the world” Morning came and grandma was gone. He would be alone for most of the day. Even though he felt like he was dying inside, Benny was still drawn to the little book on his floor. Picking it up, he flipped to the next page.

 

Well that’s the end for this chapter. I hope you liked it. The next chapter is just going to be the rest of Ethan’s journal. Ok so review and tell me what you think.


End file.
